Ready for some random rambling? Cause that is about all I have for you guys right now. So this year was meant to be the year where everything got better but that hasn't really worked out great. I started the year completely broke. Then I failed my driving test. And an hour after that my grandma died. Sucks right?
Death is a weird thing to process and understand. Other than my kitten Pepi dying when I was 12 I haven't really experienced what it is like for someone I love to die. My grandma and I weren't very close though. Which makes it even harder for me to understand how to feel.
Why weren't we close? Well it all has to do with the bad luck of being born 5 days after my cousin Francis. She is the daughter my grandma's only daughter. And my dad was the middle child to make things even worse. So there was always some sort of favouritism towards her. I actually think I wrote a post about it around last easter or the easter before that. So in the end its not really that we didn't love each other. She just loved my cousin more.
And now she is gone. No more conversations about what I am doing with my life. No more losing at scrabble against her. No more her. It is strange to think someone you have known your whole life is just gone. Forever. And as horrible as it was sometimes I will miss her. Next week I am going to her house for the funeral and I am pretty sure it will hit me much harder that she is not alive anymore. The only good thing really is that she is hopefully more at peace than she was at 97 years old. She lived her life and now it is time for her to move on.
So what else? Well I go back to uni now. Like literally now I am writing this as I travel 6 hours up country on the train. The first 40 minutes of the train was awful. My boyfriend once again dropped me off at the station to say goodbye. Again. I am so fed up of goodbyes. But hopefully he will be in Oxford next year. And he is coming up for my birthday soon.
Speaking of my birthday. On February 25th 2017 I am no longer a teenager as I turn 20. So what does that mean for this blog? I have no idea. I never thought I would be writing on here for this long. So what does Random Girl do when her blog is about being a teenager? Maybe I should start a new one. No idea what to call it though. And then I would have to start all over again. Or I could change the title? If anyone has any suggestions that would be great.
Maybe this year I will actually keep my promise to myself about writing more. So the countdown to the end of my teenage years in on. Let me know what you think.
- Random Girl x
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