4am

So it's 4 am and I am wide awake. Why? Well I'm not really sure. Maybe it has to do with the fact that my whole body hurts from carrying massive trays for hours from the last two days at work. Every muscle in my body hurts. I also keep having nightmares about too many glasses to clean, missing cutlery and food orders going wrong. Clearly work has been too stressful or I have been there too much because it's even taken over my dreams. Which sucks cause I hate work. Not the concept of work. Just my job. Lately the managers have been really shitty and either micro managing us or completely leaving us alone. I don't really mind being left alone (though that means one less much needed person isn't doing any work) but the newbies need them to order them around and explain what to do. So guess what happens? I have to help give them small jobs and explain how it's done. But I always feel bad doing it cause I feel like I'm bossing them around to much when I don't have the right to. But the problem is no one else is helping them and if no one does they just stand there doing nothing when there is way to much to do. 

So the managers hate me and the newbies probably will soon. Though I hope not. Even though they are four years younger than me, they are still nice and sweet to talk to. Especially when us older works corrupt their poor innocent minds when we talk about drugs or how to relate a banana to a... Well you get the point.

The only bright side to work (other than the money of course) is that I have my boyfriend and my best friend working there with me. Or should I say suffering there with me. Work would suck much more without them. But seriously what are the managers doing? They have way too many staff on rainy days and too little staff on sunny days (like today where I took almost all the good out on my own. Ad let me tell you that is 300 people or more for the amount of hours I was there. 

Now that I have had my random middle of the night rant about work, maybe I can finally get some peace and sleep. Because my friends are coming over tomorrow who I haven't seen in months because they have been away at uni.

Goodnight (or morning or afternoon depending on when you are reading this).

-Random Girl xxxx

Emotional Support

So if you are reading this and have read some of my other posts you might know that I recently got into a relationship for the first time in my life. Not a petty little year 9 relationship but a serious one. Sure 18 (now 19) was a bit late but oh well. Anyway back to the point. So I'm still new to a lot of things when it comes to being part of a couple and having a boyfriend. And in the last 24 hours I learnt a few new things that I thought I would share with you.

Last night I was just chilling at home with my boyfriend when mum comes home, ordering me around. I was already annoyed at her for being very controlling about my life so I stood up to her (for once). This led to a long argument that you don't really need to know the details (for now). So whilst I was arguing in the kitchen with mum I left my boyfriend in the sitting room. After arguing I basically broke down in front of him which was very embarrassing for me because he has never seen me cry. Not many people have. I was worried about what he would think of me. That I was pathetic. But instead he just spent the whole time holding me and comforting me. Just trying to make jokes to make me laugh. We had recently been saying "I love you" but it was the first time I actually knew for sure that I loved him. Hear I am a crying mess with a lot of family problems and he just tells me that he is annoyed because I still look cute when I'm crying and that he loves me. It was just such a strange concept for me to have that kind of level of support from someone when I was arguing with someone I was so close to. I said I was sorry he had to be there to witness my drama and he said he was glad that he was there so he could hold me and cheer me up.

Anyway, today he was working (at the same pub I do) and came back to mine briefly as it is practically next door to work. He was very mad because he has an awful day where the customers were rude and our boss was being a dick. And I just didn't know what to do other than listen to him rant about his day. And it sucked. I wanted to do more. To cheer him up. Make him feel happy. It was so strange to feel bad because he felt bad.  I felt awful that he had to go home (because it was late and he needed food and sleep) before I could do anything to make him feel better. I wanted to be there for him and didn't know how. It's not just a bad day at work. It has been a recurring thing and he isn't really sure what he is doing job wise right now.

I guess what I'm trying to say is emotionally supporting someone is one of the most amazing parts of being in a relationship. As cheesy as it sounds, being there for the bad parts is what matters. But it also sucks when you need to be there for someone and don't know how. 

-Random Girl xxx

A Busy Random Girl

Hey everyone! Sorry its been a little while. But really, did anyone actually believe my good streak was going to last that long? To be fair, life has never been more busy. I have had university applications to deal with, my parents have been harassing me a lot, I had a whole lot of mock exams, went out with my friends a few times and obviously spent time with the boyfriend. So yeah, extremely busy. Mocks are over and Easter is quickly approaching. It is going to suck cause I am busy with work and revision for my actual exams, but I am also very excited to have all my uni friends come home! Yay.

Life has been really depressing and boring other than my love life. School is hard, my bosses are being dickheads and most my friends are either hours away or out of the country. But at least I have someone to cheer me up when I get stressed out. The next three months are going to be tough. And the worst part is that I want to cherish the last few months I have at home before I leave for university but i'm too busy to notice.

So there is a little update on how my life is a little overloaded. Will try and write a proper post soon, but no promises!

-Random Girl xx